you (yes you!!) should change your ID to X gender

a doodle of kirby (purple hair & glasses) holding up an ID-card with a big X on it, with rainbow squiggles around the card
  1. If a whole bunch of cis people get their genders changed to X, then this dilutes the “registry” aspect of the X gender marker on IDs. Functionally, the X becomes more like a “decline to state” option (which it should be — read to the end for my utopian daydream about how gender on IDs should actually work ;). By strategically outnumbering us, you’d be keeping us safer from state surveillance and other ways that the X might single us out for harassment or problems.
  2. If a whole bunch of cis people keep going to the DMV and demanding to change their gender marker to X, then the DMV clerks are going to need to get way better about the whole process. A lot of the time, when we (transes) try to do some paperwork thing (like a gender marker or name change), we spend a lot of time talking to administrative workers who have never encountered this, don’t know how to do it, or don’t have the access and resources they’d need in order to do the thing. Significantly increased demand would force the systems to accommodate, and the process would get easier.
  3. Similarly, if a whole bunch of cis people keep getting their legal documents changed to X, then the sheer fact of “going to the DMV to ask for a X gender marker” will become less of a “let me go into a government building and explain transgenderism to 3–5 people” hellish hoop to jump through. Asking for an X gender marker will not be an indication of transgenderism, it’ll just be a thing that people do.
  • pronouns 101 and pronouns 102 is about what to do if you’ve been trying for a while, but are still really struggling
  • a post about the phenomenon of implicit misgendering, which is when they/them pronouns and gender-neutral language can be used in a harmful way
  • a post on what to do if YOU want to try new pronouns, but aren’t sure you’re trans



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Kirby Conrod

Kirby Conrod


Dr. Conrod is a linguist and scholar sort of at large. They write about transgender stuff, the linguistics of pronouns, and ways to work with your brain.